let me try to understand another part of myself. I am depressed. I am trying to read nietzsche’s antichrist, but im having trouble because it soes not look like it targets what problems I have. Part 7 made me think – but I have forgotten what I thought so I will read some more. I do have a vague idea of what I was thinking but I will retrace the ideas before I type. (“but they do not say “nonentity,” they say “beyond,” or “god,” or “the true life”; or nirvana or salvation or blessedness instead. This innocent thetoric, which belongs to the realm…”) I embrace nonentity. It makes me depressed. I am pessimistic. I like being that way, but it leads to sadness frequently.
I have a fear that at one point in life, there will be a “switch” in my mind that will be flipped, where I will convert wholey to a religion (likely what I originally was, catholic) and become a zealot of them. A grunt of religious warfare. I hope it wont happen.
And I have said this before. At least I will be able to more easily remind myself of my fears with facebook. Thank you facebook